Campaign of the Month

Everybody knows that Jesus was a 40-a-day chainsmoking lunatic that created a religion and then tried to give up. (On smoking and religion)
After embarking on a nationwide campaign in Bethlehem and Jerusalem, people had become bored of Jesus's babblings and magic tricks, (healing the blind etc...), so they didn't listen to Jesus when he wanted everyone to give up smoking.
Seen here, Jesus is actually on the cross because he wanted attention and this was the only way to do it. Later, the cigarettes were edited out and he became a matar. Take into account that Jesus was a carpenter. Wouldn't he know how to take nails out of wood?
Anywho, Jesus wasn't crucified by Pontius Pilot. He was killed in a David Blaine like stunt.